Lord of the Chickens
by xxXClever BlondeXxx
Summary: SO, chicken has taken over the world, and many food lovers are in Heaven. Watch as Natsu, Luffy and all the characters that aren't Natsu and Luffy fight and eat these evil beasts! Rated T for the bad, bad language these people use. To be safe. Also, more than two crossovers here, people. Guess them. In case you can't tell, this is Crack...
1. May Our God, Our Hope, Hetalia, Save Us

Dynamite Disclaimer: I own literally nothing. I'm naked, and I have stolen someone's laptop to post this. A load of other people own a lot of things except from this story.

**Chicken Dinner, My Love**

**Chappy One **

**The Lord of the Rings**

"WANKER!" Yelled a furious England, or Iggy, as he slapped a chicken round the face. Well, it had just dissed his liquor-holding ability. That in itself is a crime.

"Calm down, at least they didn't insult your co-AGH" Sakura was thrown out the window and into the Loch Morag as no one cared what she said. Even though she was helping.

"Fuck yeah, that's how you do it, Al!" In came another character not from Hetalia. Edward Elric was flipping his plait all over the place, as he's so smexi.

So far, only one chicken has entered. That chicken shall be missed.

And so, they all went to a funeral. Not the chicken's that would just be silly. They all went to Maes Hughes' funeral (I bloody cried when he died. He was just so awesome).

"He shall be missed. Now, on with the story" Said Reverend Lovejoy or some shit like that.

-Many moments later-

"Just-just fuck you, Natsu...Fuck all of you. I'm leaving. Bye." Luffy said as he slammed the Thousand Sunny's imaginary door. He fell into the water, but no one saved him as he had just had what I call a Mega-Bitch-Strop-That-Lasts-Forever-Desu-Chan-San-Sama-Senpai-Kuuuun (Just watched some NinjaBridge...).

"Good riddance, I thought he'd never die" groaned Zoro. It was one of those days where you wished everything could just kill itself and leave you alone so you could be in peace. But Zoro never ever had peace. Not with that bitch, Luffy, around. He was perfectly happy tied to that cross, but what did he do? Get every marine in the world to go after him. Everyone else on the crew felt the same way, except for Robin because she always wants to die.

"SUPRISE MUDFAKAS!"Yelled Sakura as she ripped out Natsu's pink/salmon hair to glue to her own head.

"Save...Me...My...Precious..."And then the Thousand Sunny sunk, taking everyone in this story into the Lord of the Rings, where Nami was Frodo, Zoro was Gollum, Sakura was one of them watery dead things, and all the fans of every Anime/Manga ever was orcs. The end until the next time I update this story.


	2. Nami Something's Violent

_Clever Blonde: Yo! Uh, I wasn't going to update this... But I was bored.. Also, my other story, well... I don't like it, and do not wasnt to update it as I basically have no motivation whatsoever. So there. Discontinued._

_Iggy: So, basically, you're saying you're lazy? You are the worst author in England..._

_Clever Blonde: Psh, whatever. You're just jealous that I'm a better cook than you_

_Iggy: My food is amazing. Anyway, Blondey owns nothing except the clothes she is wearing- not even hers, actual. She just borrowed them. Also, the plot to this 'story'_

_**Chapter 2**_

**Nami of SomethingLand**

So, last time the load of people in the first chapter was transported to the Lord of the Rings. If I remember correctly, Nami was Frodo, Zoro was Gollum, Sakura was one of them watery dead things, and all the fans of every Anime/Manga ever was orcs. Yes, that sounds about right. Now, here the story continues.

Luffy got up, groggily, and groaned. He was in this weirdo place filled with these weird looking things, much like himself. HEY, have you _seen _how low his ears are? Trust me, it's freaky.

Anyway, as Luffy was looking around, he noticed his crew members and excitedly jumped onto Zoro's back (in a totally not gay way, so hah, take that fangirls). Zoro sighed calmly, and explained to Luffy that 'if he did not get off him immediately, he would cut him into one thousand pieces, perhaps more'. It really depended on how he felt.

Luffy gulped, not wanting to die just yet, not when he STILL had not become the Pirate King. He quickly slid off of Zoro, immediately distracted by the smell of meat. Mmmm, meat...

Luffy then found out that it was the burning flesh of orcs. 'Damn,' he thought, 'I really wanted to eat.'

Nami was feeling very, veeerrryyy lazy. So, when she found herself laying on the floor in a new world, she decided to stay and sleep. Unfortunately, these black shadow things was riding towards her, and she personally thought they did not look happy.

Nami, or 'Frodo', tried to get up and found that she could not. Oh. 'I guess I'll just have to converse with them. It is one of my many skills, after all'.

"So, who kicked you in the balls?" Perhaps not.

"Frodo Baggins..." The shadow thing all but moaned.

"What? Sorry, I couldn't catch that. Say it again?" Nami was just so confused. What the fuck was that thing talking about? What kind of cruel, twisted person would name their child 'Frodo Baggins'? Unless they were talking to her. But that's impossible! She was Nami... Something. Nami Something (Couldn't be bothered to look up her name).

"Frodo... Baggins...Hobbit... Ring..." Okay, now it was just spouting rubbish. Seriously, what did it think it was?

"Okay, if you think you can talk to me like that, you are in the wrong, buddy, the wrong. Try even once more to talk to me, Naomi Something, like that, the I will be the one who will kick you in the balls."

It simply lifted it's head, so slowly that even the slowest slow would not be as slw as this slow head lifting tournament (think I used the word 'slow' enough in there?) It drew in a humongous breath.

"FRODO FUCKING BAGGINGS. A HOBBIT. HE HAS THE RING. THE RING WHICH STORES ALL OF THE POWER. SERIOUSLY, OUR LAIR HAS LITERALLY NO POWER, AND WE NEED THE INTERNET. WE CAN'T OST STORIES AND BE ABSOLUTE CUNTS ON THE INTERNET WITHOUT THE RING!" He/She/Perverted Alien/ It yelled. Nami strutted up to the shadow, and slapped it.

The end fr another chapter... I REALIZE these are all short... SOZ. I am not that good at lengthy writing... Is it bad to blame it on an illness? I don't know. I swear on my life I have ADHD.

R&R


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